Ephesians 5:22 – 6:9, Maintaining joy and peace while in the midst of broken institutions.

Class Outline:

Wednesday February 2,2022

The main idea: The redemption of Christ is aimed at removing the results of sin and of the fall in every way.


The true pattern of marriage is Christ and the church and not the Garden of Eden. If we based our hope on the Garden of Eden then we might imagine that in our marriages and homes that we can create something perfect - a perfect environment with two perfect people who are perfectly in love. We definitely strive for perfection, but we also know that it is not reality.


Love, joy, and peace are our birthright. If we lack them, the problem lies with us alone and not others.


I think that we’ve sufficiently covered the doctrine of marriage, and if we have been listening, we know the role of the husband and wife and what marriage is supposed to look like. However, marriage doesn’t often look like it should, but that doesn’t mean that any one of us should despair. This is the main idea of this message, and it is a temporary offshoot of our main study. When confronted with the beauty of what Christ has done and the potential beauty that will give to our lives, our churches, our marriages, our homes, and our work, are we allowed to despair and lack joy when things don’t become beautiful because of people who lack faith? Absolutely not. The believer must produce the fruit of the Holy Spirit by walking by the Spirit, despite the people in his life or the circumstances of his life.


The one place that is not an institution but is us alone with God is our soul. It must be a cultivated garden growing the healthy fruit of the Spirit.


God has a solution for every problem that each of us face. By faith we know that love, joy, and peace are the birthright of the new humanity in Christ, and by faith we know that if we don’t currently possess them, then the problem lies only in ourselves and not in our spouse or our situation.


I can imagine a scenario when a husband or wife got used to the status quo of the condition of their marriage, but then they listened to this past week’s messages and they have come to see, perhaps even for the first time, what their marriage is supposed to look like. The flaws in that relationship and home, ones that they had become used to, become glaringly obvious and their world begins to look bleak. They may despair and start to lose heart. If this happens, they have forgotten some foundational truths.


1. God never promised that life would be easy. On the contrary, He promised that those who walked with Him would suffer in this world.


PHI 1:29-30

For to you it has been granted for Christ's sake, not only to believe in Him, but also to suffer for His sake, 30 experiencing the same conflict which you saw in me, and now hear to be in me.


1PE 4:12-16

Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal among you, which comes upon you for your testing, as though some strange thing were happening to you; 13 but to the degree that you share the sufferings of Christ, keep on rejoicing; so that also at the revelation of His glory, you may rejoice with exultation. 14 If you are reviled for the name of Christ, you are blessed, because the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you. 15 By no means let any of you suffer as a murderer, or thief, or evildoer, or a troublesome meddler; 16 but if anyone suffers as a Christian, let him not feel ashamed, but in that name let him glorify God.


We can remember that in our suffering we have a unique opportunity to do what we were designed for: glorify God.


2CO 4:17-18

For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, 18 while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal.


1CO 10:13

No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, that you may be able to endure it.


Please notice that God does the allowing. In similar manner, when a man and woman get married, God is the one that makes them one flesh.


Suffering is a part of the Christian life. Don’t pray for suffering to go away, pray to God for you to see the way to overcome. Remember Paul’s thorn in the flesh.


2. We are not to judge others nor can we change others. Only God can soften a heart that repents.


ROM 14:4

Who are you to judge the servant of another? To his own master he stands or falls; and stand he will, for the Lord is able to make him stand.


JAM 4:11-12

Do not speak against one another, brethren. He who speaks against a brother, or judges his brother, speaks against the law, and judges the law; but if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law, but a judge of it. 12 There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the One who is able to save and to destroy; but who are you who judge your neighbor?


2TI 2:20-26

Now in a large house there are not only gold and silver vessels, but also vessels of wood and of earthenware, and some to honor and some to dishonor. 21 Therefore, if a man cleanses himself from these things, he will be a vessel for honor, sanctified, useful to the Master, prepared for every good work. 22 Now flee from youthful lusts, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 23 But refuse foolish and ignorant speculations, knowing that they produce quarrels. 24 And the Lord's bond-servant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged, 25 with gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth, 26 and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, having been held captive by him to do his will.


We teach the truth, correct with gentleness, but are not quarrelsome. The devil has snares for the unbeliever as well as the believer. God alone can grant repentance when a believer is ignoring their relationship with Him. We might get caught in the trap of thinking that if they had only heard today’s message or if they only had read this passage in the Bible, but remember, there is a reason that they are not maintaining their consistent exposure to God’s word. They might hear the message that you want them to, but it they don’t love God’s word enough to be self-motivated to read and hear it, the problem is much deeper, and that depth only God can go to. And still, we have to remember that God is going to show them (and we should pray for this) but God is not going to force them.


1PE 3:1-6

In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, 2 as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. 3 And let not your adornment be merely external — braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; 4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. 5 For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands. 6 Thus Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear.


It will seem counterintuitive to our temptation to control things by doing what we can to force someone to change, but God tells the wife to submit and behave spiritually. It is not a guarantee that the husband will come around, but it is the only way.


Christ made everything right, but only by faith can people enter in.